Civility - Where did it Go?

When I was a child, I was strongly encouraged to be a real child.  "Be seen and not heard" was the modus operandi of the day.  That philosophy, while probably too far in one direction, should be brought back today. We had to call adults by a title and their last name:  So it was "Mr." Barber, not "John."  It was "Mrs. Smith" and not "Sally."  To this day, I call adults older than me "Mr." or "Mrs."  Perhaps that's going a tad bit far but I don't necessarily think it appropriate that a 4-year old call me by my first name.  He or she hasn't yet earned that honor.

I can only fault my generation for raising a bunch of "I'm so special" young adults that seem to fill the world today.  I've worked with them, hired some by mistake, and have to sit next to them on public transportation all the time.  I want to say, "No you are not special. You are not the smartest, prettiest, cutest, funniest person on the planet.  You are just an ordinary person like the rest of us.  Get used to it. . . or better yet, get over it."  

Of course since I was raised in my generation and am uptight with manners, I would never do that because, God forbid, I might hurt their feelings.  I'm sorry but their feelings deserve to be hurt.

And when and why did my generation stop teaching common sense to their kids?  This would have required correcting their children, and my generation wanted their kids to 'like' them.  Correcting the child would imply criticism and the kid would not like the parent - ergo, common sense went the route of the Nehru suit. 

I would rather have an employee that had 100 points of common sense  compared to an individual with an IQ of 190 with no common sense.  The last person with whom I worked thought she was such a brain but did not have the common sense to come in out of the rain.  I used to think, "there is no such thing as a stupid question."  That is a stupid expression because this woman proved there are stupid questions.

Why did my generation stop teaching their special progeny that they only need consider their own feelings.  Why didn't they whisper to  these wonderful children that there are others on the planet with whom they have to share?  I am constantly boggled by the lack of civility in America today.

Signs abound on the bus about not eating.  But, ride the CTA - bus, rail, whatever - you see families taking out full picnic lunches and proceeding to chow down.   Who gave them this right?  Starbucks coffee cups abound in the morning on moving, jerking vehicles that inadvertently stop suddenly.  I pity the fool that ever spills one on me.  

And why do I have to be subjected to hearing to hearing in excruciating detail, why the talker in question hates her "friend."  This of course is being loudly shared with whoever is on the other end of that candy bar looking device that everyone seems to be attached to - the ubiquitous cell phone.  "I'm just five minutes away - I'm on the bus - I had a bad night -went to the bar. . . and no, he didn't call me like he promised."  I do not need to hear this banal patter.  

What happened to civility and to privacy?  I do not want to hear the details of some stranger's life.  I have enough issues with my own life.  If nothing else, being forced to listen in takes me out of my zone that is "all about me."  But at least, I'm "all about me" quietly.  I'm not sharing the intimate details of my life publicly. I'm not eating my dinner in front of by other bus or train ride compatriots.  I'm not slurping my "Chai latte skim no-fat decaf extra tall" all over some stranger's new white silk outfit.